The Most Important Status Updates You Can Pay Attention to

The other night I was sitting at my dinner table with my family and the kids, all 6 of them, were being chatter boxes.  I felt like asking them all to take a deep breath and be quiet. But then I realized something that I needed to remember.  They were sharing the details of their life with me and it would be easy to ignore these status updates but they are the most important ones I can pay attention to.  I do love Facebook and Twitter but staying up to date on everyone else and missing what my kids are saying would be really sad.  So I’m taking more moments to listen, to be in the moment and stay up to date on my kids statuses.

Do you struggle with missing your kids status updates?  What ways do you make time to really hear them?

New Ways to Approach a New Year {especially when last year didn’t quite go as planned}

If you are one of those who have come face to face with a new year that you weren’t quite ready for then raise your hand.  That would be me this year.  Usually I’m ready, more than ready, for a fresh start to a new year and I want a fresh start but I just don’t feel ready. There are still so many things that were left undone last year.

Somewhere about mid Fall I realized that I was running on just about empty. I was giving so much in so many areas and not really finding ways to be refreshed and filled up myself.  Part of it was because there was already so much to do and I couldn’t keep up.  I tried but I just couldn’t.

So when I got to January 1st of 2013 I just felt like going back and playing catch-up. Making up for the past year doesn’t seem like a good way to go into a new year. So I decided I really needed to dissect what happened and why I felt so overwhelmed.

Part of it was just life. Things happened that were well outside of my control.  Lots of things. This past year was one of surprises and not necessarily the good kind. There was a lesson it all that I am still learning but most of all that I need to understand that these things can and will happen.

Another part of it was a lack of margin. I had so much to do this past year that, if I was honest, would have taken a pro organizer more than a year to do. I was setting myself up for failure.  This year I am intentionally saying no to a lot more and purposefully scheduling more margin into my life.

I also tried to do a lot of it on my own.  I need family and friend in my life.  Even if they aren’t close by, I need their voice in my life to encourage me and stay connected.  I was so busy this past year that even taking time to connect was a challenge.  This year I want to remember that I need the connection and it makes the rest of everything better when I have it.

I need to keep reevaluating what isn’t working. You know how you can get so frustrated that things are going the way they are but not even feel like you have the time to stop and fix it? Well, that was me and it is so worth taking the time to step back and reevaluate it all. Reevaluate what is not working and make changes.  If it isn’t working it isn’t acceptable.  if you don’t know how to change something that isn’t working than you may need some outside advice which is where my next point comes in…

I can learn from older, wiser women. This is something that has really been on my heart lately.  I met a woman this year who, unknowingly, challenged me to see older women differently.  She shared with me how she felt invisible to younger women and it about broke my heart.  She has great wisdom and experience with raising kids and being a wife and yet that knowledge and wisdom is going to waste because no one is benefiting from it.  She, and many other older women, have been through so much of what I am struggling with right now. She could be a wealth of information, support and encouragement. I am very intentionally seeking out a local mentor this year.  Someone who has had a similar circumstances in life that is willing to come along side of me and teach me how to do this mothering thing, and being a wife, well.

My list of goals for this year are simple and specific. They are intentional but not overwhelming.  I plan to keep coming back to the list above and make sure that I am doing all of these things.  I hope to look back on 2013 having accomplished my goals with lots of grace for myself and having used wisdom and intention along the way.

How about you? Are you looking back at 2012 and happy with the way it went?  Have any tips for us?

I hope your 2013 is off to a great start! There are some changes in the works for Mommy Kudos.  I’m excited about the journey ahead for us!

 

Oh My Goodness! I’m Just Like My Mother! {And My Kids Will Be Just Like Their Mother Too!}

 

Whether we had the greatest mother in the world or not, most of us realize at some point that we are doing something that is just like her. That works for both the good and the bad things.  Seldom do we think about how our kids will be just like us.

There are things I don’t love about my life but I live with them because they would be hard to change. But when you tell me that these things are examples that my children are going to follow it makes me feel desperate to change them.

If I want my kids to value friendships then I really need to model for them making time for friends.  If I want them to stay close to each other then I need to let them see me making time for my siblings.  If I want them to stay connected to me then shouldn’t I be staying connected to my own mother as an example that it is important?

These are the workings of my mind lately.  I have an opportunity to model values to my kids that I want them to have.  It doesn’t mean I can control them as they grow older but that they have seen the benefits of my good choices and know how much the effort is worth.

Are there things you know that you would like your kids to value as they grow older? What are ways that you intentionally model those values for them?

31 Days to Becoming an Organized Mom: Day 31- This. Just This.

“This. Just This.”  Have you noticed that in social media people are telling you that you should read, or view something by simply saying “This” as if it included words like “must read” and “exactly how I feel?”  When I see the words “This. Just this” it says to me that it hit the person sharing it right in the heart and I may want to read it too.

After spending 31 days attempting to become an organized mom, I am reflecting on the “this” moments along my journey.  Like what when I started because I needed to tell my family they were important enough to me to do the hard work of making our home beautiful and peaceful.  Or when I realized that I needed to have the right mindset. A “this” moment also came when I read about how organizing might just be organized hoarding and I almost wanted to throw away everything I have.

{click the picture to download a “this” print to use as a reminder for yourself}

Becoming an organized mom reminds me that my family is my “this.”  I want to savor the moments I have with them.  I want to be present and not always feeling stressed and overwhelmed.  I want “this” to punctuate moments of chatting long, about princesses over tea with my 4 year old, or the cutest boy in school, with my almost teen twins.  I want to remember “this” when there is extra time in my day to go for a walk or play a game or plan a special date night with my husband.

I’m praying that my life becomes full of “this” moments where I just breathe it in and think “this is what it’s all about.”  I encourage you to find the moments in your life when the only thing that describes them is “this.”

Here’s to many “this” moments as you become a better organized mom! This has been fun and I look forward to even more organizing ideas to come.